Seeing the Merry-go-Round

“Everyone from time to time should go back over the events they have experienced and how they lived them, as well as the people they have met – those who contributed good things as well as those who caused them difficulties. Even if there are no obvious similarities between these people, they may have emanated something in common. By making a habit of sensing and analysing what radiates from these people, they will know how to deal with strangers when they come across them. And it is the same with events; many repeat themselves in another form, and if you have not studied them properly to learn from them, you will find yourself in the same dead ends without ever knowing why. Life follows a kind of periodic movement – everything is repeated, but never in exactly the same way, and it is up to each of us to develop our sense of observation and our judgment.”

– Omraam Mikhael Aivanhov
Aivanhov is making a point here, which any recovering alcoholic, child of an alcoholic parent, or person who comes from an abusive background will tell you, that human beings are creatures of habit, we have a tendency to gravitate towards situations which feel “normal” to us. It takes an ungodly amount of psychic energy to break out of those cycles.
Many, not all, alcoholics have a history of it somewhere in their past.

Many, not all, alcoholics have a history of it somewhere in their past.

If growing up in an abusive household is “normal” for someone, there is an increased likelihood that they will then go towards abusive relationships later in life because those are the dynamics which they are used to. That’s their “normal”. I realize that is a massive generalization and assuming that said person has done no interior work whatsoever or taken time off to really sit down and think about these things. This in no way justifies the phoney excuse of using less-than-idyllic backgrounds to justify acting like an asshole later on in life, but I’m grossly over-generalizing and there are exceptions to every rule. (One of my parents was a smoker, and if anything it made me run in the opposite direction.)
There is no such thing as "Normal".

There is no such thing as “Normal”.

I’ve seen it with female friends who had one or both parents who conducted secretive affairs outside of the marriage. Guess what sort of a fellow she ends up marrying or spouse she ends up being? Yeah, a cheater. Many persons in the sex trade, strippers, porn actors, prostitutes, gigolos and escorts (excluding the ones who really want to do this work), when you sit down and talk to them, you realize there’s usually some sort of sexual abuse in the history somewhere.
Porn actress Jenna Jameson teen years were not exactly happy.

Porn actress Jenna Jameson teen years were not exactly happy.

They realized from an early age that using their sexuality was the only way to either get attention or receive their sense of love. It was the only way they knew of because no other alternatives were shown to them. (If you ever get the chance, check out “BUtterfield 8” with Elizabeth Taylor and Laurence Harvey in their slickest 1960’s glory and listen closely to her monologue with Eddie Fisher.)
Laurence Harvey and Elizabeth Taylor, at their 1960s best in "Butterfield 8"

Laurence Harvey and Elizabeth Taylor, at their 1960s best in “BUtterfield 8”

It got me thinking about how much are we really slaves or products of our past? Is all this “power of positive thinking” and “creating your reality” merely mechanisms people use to gloss over the rocky underbelly of their pasts, not deal with those issues on an emotional, more basic level?
Really?

Really?

Projecting themselves outward towards the future without fully understanding and accepting the past? I have nothing against keeping a positive state of mind, cutting down on the levels of negativity you allow to enter into your life to focus on better things but something about “creating your own reality” seems a little false…a little disingenuous. Like Aivanhov, I agree that everything leaves an imprint or emanation of some sort. Good and bad. I’ve seen way too many sincere people who fell for things like “The Secret” to only watch unresolved issues stalk them and engulf them with even more ferocity later on. It’s ultimately about how honest you want to be with yourself.
If this is so great, then why are so many people in this world still poor, particularly the ones who read this book and watched the film?

If this is so great, then why are so many people in this world still poor, particularly the ones who read this book and watched the film?

As for me, it’s realizing how much I often gave away, extended myself or accomodated too easily, whether it was trust, loyalty, friendship or patience and understanding all too late many times that I gave away or accomodated too much and received hardly anything in return. Not that I ever expected it or felt entitled to anything. It was just never offered. It’s a horrible realization to finally see the many masks and guises selfishness can take to hide itself. By the same token, there have also been times where generosity, understanding and those other gifts have shown up in the most unlikely corners under the most unlikely circumstances. I think those are the real blessings, the real angels. They only show up once you get off that merry-go-round of the past. But you have to see it first. Clearly.
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Categories: Ascension, False prophits, Politico, Raise your EQ | Tags: , | 5 Comments

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5 thoughts on “Seeing the Merry-go-Round

  1. Alise

    I beg to disagree, I do believe every person will do what is in their intrinsic nature to do, regardless of their upbringing or environment. Intelligent beings have a choice as to what they will tolerate or entertain in their world…and a conscience. Can good trees bring forth bad fruit? Can bad trees bring forth good fruit?

  2. The Nature vs. Nurture argument can get tricky sometimes. I agree we do have choice over some matters but what happens when that environment doesn’t offer many choices to begin with? Did that girl from New Delhi on the bus “create her reality” when she was on that bus not alone but with a male companion no less when she was gang-raped with a 4 foot long metal rod? Did she “attract” the rape to her by the energy she was putting out? What about the ongoing atrocities against women and children on a nation-wide scale in places like the Democratic Republic of the Congo? Some alcoholics have a genetic disposition towards the disease. I saw many people in DC from the inner city neighborhoods and projects who could not get off the cycle of poverty, violence and social disenfranchisement because the support and resources did not and do not exist. The same on Native and First Nations reservations. There were a few who managed to but only because they had role models or some sort of on-going support around them.
    Unfortunately too much of this power of positive thinking sort of stuff is anchoring in magical thinking and prevents people to really problem-solve from a more basic level, identify real issues and then take meaningful action, including allowing which influences to enter their life or not.

    • Alise

      Maybe it all comes down to the choices we make prior to mortality…..choosing our parents, genetics and environment. Life is not what it seems….probably nothing is what it seems, only our perception makes sense and only to us most of the time.

  3. I enjoyed this post EER, and you brought up points that ring true on several levels. When it comes to the nature vs. nurture argument I feel we all have the capacity to be wildly good and wonderfully evil, however the outcome boils down to our upbringing, immediate environment AND the choices we make. While we are creatures of habit, I sometimes think that people are fully aware of what they’re doing and can’t help but wonder if they allow themselves to get locked into cycles of confusion, misery and/or abuse (*note: I’m thinking about adults who have grown up in a Western context here as women brutalized in the DRC or child molestation – for example – are a whole different can of worms) because it’s easier that way. Sometimes people feel the world owes them something because of an incident (or several) that occurred in the past. Other times it’s simpler to either not look inward at all and/or gloss over the past with positive-thinking psycho babble and forgo the investment of looking at behavioural patterns, attitudes and examining the choices we make.

    I think in many ways we are socialized to give up our power and any shred of individual responsibility. By doing so we can find someone/something to blame else for the suffering/misadventures in our lives. Isn’t it far better to be able to blame God, the neighbour, your mother when you lose your job/your partner walks out/you get carjacked at 26, 37 or 46 than it is to look inward and see where you could have taken a different path and the actions you yourself were responsible for? E.g. Is it really ok at the age of 50 to keep blaming one of your parents for your dysfunctional relationships? Also where does the difference lie between people who go through some pretty horrific stuff and find ways to overcome it and live amazing lives and those who can not let go of certain events and use it/them as a crutch to continue engaging in self-depreciating/self-harming behaviour?

    A perfect – and rather simplistic – example I am privy to all the time in Egypt is speaking to people about heaven knows what and inevitably they insert the word “Insha’allah” (God willing) into a phrase instead of making a choice and using either “yes” or “no.” Do you want to meet up for dinner tomorrow? Insha’allah. Would you be interested in helping me with some work I need to get done? Insha’allah. It’s a word that implies divine intervention and lack of interest in being responsible and making a choice all into one. One time I snapped at a cab driver who was rudely flippant when I asked to be driven across town. He lazily looked at me for several moments before drawling out a lengthy “Insha’llah.”

    Needless to say, I found another cab.

    • Agree with you completely FTI.
      One thing I have noticed though is very often that people who insist on the “create you reality”/magical thinking scenario as the only scenario, upon closer inspection are sometimes dishonest or less-than-forthcoming about something in their own lives. I also think it is a dangerous and slippery slope for some personalities who simply don’t know any better. It sounds so amazing and positive on the surface, right? So it’s easy to see why the lure of it attracts people who may have undergone difficult circumstances. But then they do the visualizations or exercises or whatever to create that reality and it fails to materialize. I’ve witnessed so-called counselors (and I think there was also a “Sex and the City” episode with Charlotte trying to visualize love after she broke up with Trey and the motivational speaker chastising her to “visualize and affirm more”) who then rub more salt into the wound by saying “Well I guess you deserved it” or “You’re not trying hard enough” which then throws the person into another cycle of guilt and self-recrimination for not getting it. I can’t think of a worse thing to do than to prey on the vulnerabilities of people and then chastise them for it.
      Real help or assistance empowers individuals, it doesn’t ask people to give up their responsibility or power. There’s almost a sense of collaboration and goodwill around it. The kind of “help” I’ve seen in the New Age and self-help world seems more like “Do what I say and wrote and you’ll be fine” and serves nothing more than to inflate the egos or line the coffers of less-genuine “teachers”. I think resilience plays a large part in who gets past certain events and issues and those who can’t. Unfortunately they just don’t teach those kinds of skills. Or sell them.

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