Another girl in this world was getting on a bus to go home got raped, burned and dumped in a roadside ditch.
Typical Turkish dolmus
Ozgecan Aslan, a Turkish psychology student got on a dolmus
, a shared mini-bus, on her way home from her university in Adana to Mersin. After her friend got off the dolmus, she was left alone with the driver. When he stopped the dolmus to rape her, she fought back by pepper-spraying him. He then apparently stabbed her and hit on the head, knocking her out. His father and friend then helped him burn her body to get rid of the evidence and dumped her in a dried river bed in a forested area.
There have been the usual protest marches and arrests in the wake of this incident as women across Turkey have protested. Some people are pointing fingers at the political culture of Turkey these days.
Erdogan despite making Turkey very wealthy this last decade, is also a sympathizer of very conservative strains of Islam, where women should wear head coverings, women should not have sex outside of marriage, and a woman’s sexuality and freedom are controlled and dictated by men, either her husband, her father or her brother.
Trent Mays and Ma’lik Richmond both 16 at the time of the crime, were convicted in juvenile court for the rape of a minor in the Steubenville High School rape case.
Some people say the problem is Islam. I don’t think so because like the rapes in Hindu India the past two years have shown or the latest statistics of rape on American college campuses
, it’s not religion which is the problem, it’s the culture and to get even more specific, it is the way women are viewed and perceived as, as agencies for male utility, I think.
From Stats Canada.
I think many of these types of men feel like they have lost control of the situation and don’t know how to deal with it. Just look at Henry Makow’s site
and it’s enough to make you lose your lunch. If you are a man, and your whole life, and before that your father, grandfather, great-grandfather, your nation, your culture, your religion, your world told you, promised you that you are better, you are stronger, you can get anything you want, anytime you want, women are there to serve you, you start to internalize this message. Repetition is a powerful form of indoctrination.
Two Japanese women shopping together
When outside reality doesn’t jive with your internalized reality or internal dialogue, it usually causes a very uncomfortable feeling called cognitive dissonance
and that’s when usually something goes “Pop!”. For example, It’s when a sexually starved guy living in some one-donkey village his whole life who watches hard-core porn constantly, then assumes women really act like this all the time and can do all those things if you say the right words to her or corner her into that situation.
Women’s number one killers are usually domestic partners.
I had mentioned male utility earlier on, that men can usually look on women as something of use to them, someone who performs a function for them (I am aware that women also unfortunately do the same thing to men as well).
I sometimes wonder if men AND women even know how to begin to perceive of themselves beyond those old “roles” or labels of mother, wife, husband, father, lover, fuck-buddy, cook, house-cleaner or whatever and just learn to BE. I think part of the problem is language itself and how associated memes and images are attached to certain words play out in our mind.
Mom from the 1950s. This is not coming back, anytime soon and you’d better get used to it.
When I read the word “mother” a certain imprinted image shows up in my mind along with associated behaviors of what’s “normal” and “not normal” for a “mother” and I might forget to look at the unique individual behind the word. A clichéd meme takes over the actual individual and it is because of this, I think, it is going to take an ungodly amount of work, brutal honesty, self-reflection and psychic energy for all of us, particularly men, to willingly deprogram our baggage and expectations on each other and change those memes.
Scene from FSOG, from Youtube.
I have nothing against erotica or BDSM
by itself, especially if it concerns consenting adults, then that’s their own business what they do in the privacy of their own lives. A key part of BDSM is the power play between partners, who is dominant, who is submissive and FSOG plays again on the cliché of a dominant, powerful male (Christian Grey is a billionaire industrialist) exerting control and power over a submissive female student, hapless to his whims and desires (and money). The fact that these books and film are so popular I think exposes the women who fall for this fantasy of something deeply troubling on a psychic level. It’s about giving your power and your control away to someone else to make you happy (or get you off), even if it is on a physical level. People in the BDSM community might then say that’s when the trust comes in. I don’t know.
A “sub” waiting for the “dom”
Personally, I don’t get it. The best sex is usually when there is a strong presence of mutuality involved (which is why I think simultaneous, mutual orgasm is the Holy Grail of trashy romance novels). I don’t find anything remotely arousing about playing a limp, pleading rag doll to some He-Man sex machine or vice versa.
“There are few people on the left who grasp the immense danger of allowing pornography to replace intimacy, sex and love. Much of the left believes that pornography is about free speech, as if it is unacceptable to financially exploit and physically abuse a woman in a sweatshop in China but acceptable to do so on the set of a porn film, as if torture is wrong in Abu Ghraib, where prisoners were sexually humiliated and abused as if they were on a porn set, but permissible on commercial porn sites. A new wave of feminists, who have betrayed the iconic work of radicals such as Andrea Dworkin, defends porn as a form of sexual liberation and self-empowerment. These “feminists,”… are stunted products of neo-liberalism and postmodernism. Feminism, for them, is no longer about the liberation of women who are oppressed; it is defined by a handful of women who are successful, powerful and wealthy—or, as in the case of “Fifty Shades of Grey,” able to snag a rich and powerful man. A woman wrote the “Fifty Shades” book, as well as the screenplay. A woman directed the film. A woman studio head bought the movie. This collusion by women is part of the internalization of oppression and sexual violence that have their roots in porn. Dworkin understood. She wrote that “the new pornography is a vast graveyard where the Left has gone to die. The Left cannot have its whores and its politics too.”
Gail Dines, along with a handful of others including Jensen, fearlessly decry a culture that is as depraved as Caligula’s Rome.
“The porn industry has hijacked the sexuality of an entire culture and is laying waste to a whole generation of boys,” she warned. “And when you lay waste to a generation of boys, you lay waste to a generation of girls.”
“When you fight porn you fight global capitalism,” she said. “The venture capitalists, the banks, the credit card companies are all in this feeding chain. This is why you never see anti-porn stories. The media is implicated. It is financially in bed with these companies. Porn is part of this. Porn tells us we have nothing left as human beings—boundaries, integrity, desire, creativity and authenticity. Women are reduced to three orifices and two hands. Porn is woven into the corporate destruction of intimacy and connectedness, and this includes connectedness to the earth. If we were a society where we were whole, connected human beings in real communities, then we would not be able to look at porn. We would not be able to watch another human being tortured.””
The women of Turkey and Ozgecan’s funeral coffin.